“Gays,” the “American Church,” and 2 Severed Relationships Pt. 2/5

April 22, 2014 by Jer 4 Comments

In part 1 of this 5-part series, I offered the three encounters that fueled this project:

This Quote: “The World Vision debacle exposed two severed relationships: the one between the American Church and the LGBT community and the other is between the American Church and itself.”
This Number: A key facilitator of cross-sector leadership, pointed to the now “10,000 UN-sponsored kids” as the most recent reason why the church is obsolete.
This Observation: A gay friend pointed out how efficient the “American Church” is at dehumanizing the LGBTQ community by “talking about us as though we’re not in the room.”

The more curious I got with my gay friends, the more I was confronted by the reality of our soiled reputation from the perspective of the LGBTQ community: a reputation that looks and sounds nothing like the Jesus that we claim to follow.

Four questions emerged from our conversations that two of my gay friends committed to interact with as authentically, colorfully, concisely, and constructively as possible. They’ve agreed to let me post their answers because they trust our friendship and they believe, as do I, that what we learn may actually help repair the severed relationship between us.

Let me briefly re-introduce my two friends and then get to the first question.

Annika is an agnostic lesbian whose passion it is to see an interfaith network of queer and straight people, alongside atheists and agnostics, working together in order to see equitable treatment for all people.
Constantine is an artist, a theologian, a minister, a follower of Jesus, and a gay man who desires to see the conversations shift from “sexuality” and “marriage” to “identity” and “intimacy.”

Question 1 :: Can you reflect with us on your experience of being a gay, lesbian, or same-sex attracted human being?

Contstantine’s Response:

I’ve been a Christ follower my entire life, and I also identify as a man with same-sex attractions. I’ve always attended church – serving in full-time ministry for nine years – and also work in theatres, galleries and museums. My friends are theologians and addicts, evangelical pastors and gay rights advocates, Sunday school teachers and atheists. In all these environments, the conversation around “the gay issue” reduces me to only a portion of my full self.

Everyone wants to talk about “sexuality” – what I desire to do with whom within which parameters – when I’m more interested in exploring “identity,” the totality of who God created me to be, a portion of which concerns my body.

Marriage, ironically, is a hotly contested topic. Some of my Christian friends uphold it as the most sacred institution, forgetting that Paul encouraged us to do without it if we could, and extolled our relationships within the Church as the exemplar of agape love. Meanwhile, my gay friends fight to obtain equal marriage rights, knowing, though, that a license proves nothing. The dialogue feels inadequate. In the middle again, I want to change the conversation from “marriage” to “intimacy” – how God calls me to know and be known by God, myself, and perhaps a spouse.

I don’t want to settle for anything less than my unique life warrants, and so I keep inviting friends on both sides of the debate into a bigger and better conversation about the identity and intimacy that we all – gay and straight – long for. And that conversation is a lot more complex than anything we have yet faced.

Annika’s Response:

I came out in 2006 after repressing my sexual orientation for many years. On the recommendations of pastors, I sought to “pray-away-the-gay” through reparative therapy and other various spiritual means. These techniques ended up being harmful in that they produced self-hatred, self-loathing and, ultimately, a suicidal longing. As far as I knew, because it had been reinforced by the teachings of my church, G-d hated me.

Since I’ve come out and fully accepted and embraced my sexuality, a weight has lifted and I’ve discovered a freedom that I didn’t know was possible.

As I reflect back on my time with the church, I recognize just how lonely I was. I think my loneliness and feelings of being less than human had something to do with the church’s commitment to being right instead of its commitment to developing authentic relationships with no strings attached.

I ask you, what has the church’s commitment to being “right” on the gay issue produced? I would suggest that it has produced a community of human beings that understands itself as disowned.

I don’t fit in the church. Christianity isn’t for me. That became clear years ago. I’m now agnostic.

Enter the Dialogue:

Here are four questions for consideration (please keep your contribution civil and helpful, remembering that Annika, Constantine, and their many friends are reading along.)

What did I just learn about myself and my own biases, opinions, fears, and prejudices?
What did I just learn about my own contribution to the 2 severed relationships?
What did I just learn about the church?
What did I just learn about the LGBTQ community?

Tomorrow’s Question :: If you were to isolate this most recent outpouring of Christian discourse about same-sex orientation, what does the entire episode communicate to you about the “American Church?” Click Here for Part 3.

“Gays,” the “American Church,” and 2 Severed Relationships

April 20, 2014 by Jer 13 Comments

While copious amounts of time and money have been invested by churches and denominations across the country on who’s right and wrong on “the gay issue,” the little band of Jesus-Followers that I’m a part of has been quietly walking the Way of love within arguably one of the most influential gay communities in the country. We don’t have any statements or stances on sexual orientation, nor do we spend time crafting them. Instead, we simply follow Jesus’ lead by spending our lives on the repair of severed relationships. Really incredible things have happened as a result (like this moment).

Simultaneously, I train everyday peacemakers to see the humanity, dignity, and image of the Creator in as well as the plight of others and to immerse into the radical center of conflict seeking to understand rather than to be understood. We train peacemakers to embrace the beauty of their own silence so that they can listen longer than feels comfortable and respond in creative, intelligent, costly ways.

In the aftermath of World Vision’s epic flip-flop on LGBT employment and the ensuing discourse between Christian evangelicals and post-evangelicals, rightists and leftists, liberals and conservatives, etc., the lack of curiosity and listening exposed why each are more needed now than ever before.

Three recent experiences illustrate why.

As I sat with and listened to friends of diverse spiritual backgrounds and sexual orientations, I discovered that their critique didn’t focus on World Vision, but, rather, on “the Church.” One friend said, “The World Vision debacle exposed two severed relationships: the one between the American Church and the LGBT community and the other is between the American Church and itself.”
As I sat with and listened to leaders of national and global non-profits, I heard two different responses: (1) most hadn’t heard anything about it; and (2) for the ones who had, this latest Christian discourse served to reinforce their belief that the “American Church” is obsolete. On two separate occasions, I was a part of cross-sector dialogues in which the faith-based sector had not been invited to the table. When I asked why, one friend simply shrugged and guessed, “10,000 UN-sponsored kids?”
As I sat with a dear friend who seeks to follow Jesus as a gay man, I discovered how we dehumanize the LGBT community by talking about them as though they’re not sitting in the room. As the Christian discourse emerged, it was clear that we were engaged in simultaneous monologues with ourselves rather than humbly inviting the gay community to a dialogue.

In the midst of all of this, I got curious with two gay friends. The outcome of our dialogue was a set of four co-created questions that the two of them committed to authentically, colorfully, concisely, and constructively answer. What follows in the next four posts are their responses to our questions.

Here are the four questions:

Can you reflect with us on your experience of being a gay, lesbian, or same-sex attracted human being? (Posted on Tuesday, 4/22)
If you were to isolate this most recent outpouring of Christian discourse about same-sex orientation, what does the entire episode communicate to you about the “American Church?” (Posted on Wednesday, 4/23)
Christians understand that, for whatever reason, God chose to attach His reputation to human beings…specifically to the Church. Again, in light of the recent discourse, how would you describe the Jesus that is being represented by His Church? (Posted Thursday, 4/24)
If there were one teaching of Jesus that you wish the Church took seriously today, what would it be? (Posted on Friday, 4/25)

Let me introduce my two friends:

Annika has been an “out” queer woman for over seven years and is a contributing author to various resources that focus on issues of segregation and integration between the LGBT community and the contemporary American Church. She’s an agnostic whose passion it is to see an interfaith network of queer and straight people, alongside atheists and agnostics, working together in order to see equitable treatment for all people.
Constantine is an artist, a theologian, a minister, a follower of Jesus, and a gay man. His journey, which has taken him in and out of some of the most influential evangelical churches in the country, has shaped his desire to see the conversations shift from “sexuality” and “marriage” to “identity” and “intimacy.”

A Final Thought:

Regardless of where you “stand” on the “gay issue,” my hope that is we would all listen longer than feels comfortable and, in so doing, learn something about ourselves, about “the American Church,” and about the LGBT community.

Before contributing to the conversation, please ask yourself this question: “Is my contribution civil and helpful?”

If the answer is “no,” then I humbly invite you to listen longer. If the answer is “yes,” then please offer your contribution.

Tomorrow, we’ll begin with Question 1.

The Culitvate Intensive: TGIP’s Newest Initiative

March 20, 2014 by Jer Leave a Comment

I am thrilled to announce the launch of The Global Immersion Project’s newest initiative we’re calling, Cultivate: An Everyday Peacemaking Intensive. We will be hosting these events in cities across the US and are excited to host our first Cultivate event in Seattle on Thursday, April 24th in conjunction with the Parish Collective’s Inhabit Conference.

WHY “CULTIVATE” INTENSIVES?

Peacemaking has been disintegrated from the Church’s understanding of God, His mission, and our vocation. As a result, we misunderstand who God is, what God has done, and what God is seeking to do here and now. So, rather than embracing peacemaking as central to God’s heart and critical to who we are as His family, we speak of it as an esoteric theory or a subjective feeling. Rather than embracing peacemaking as an everyday, costly way of life, we both contribute to and run from conflict while outsourcing the work of peace to others. Organizationally, we place peace and reconciliation in our values, but have no idea what it looks like nor how to lead, train, or disciple to it.

WHAT ARE THEY?

Cultivate Seattle is a one-day tailor-made intensive designed to practically shift peacemaking from esoteric theory and aspiring value to costly, embodied reality. Through a fusion of engaging content, dialogue-based learning, simple experiments, and communal reflection you will:

form a robust theology of peacemaking as the mission of God
learn how to cultivate the interior world of a peacemaker
awaken to the everyday spaces of peacemaking
develop practices that help you pay attention to what’s beautiful and broken within your everyday spaces
discover how to humbly and compassionately enter into the radical center of conflict
imagine costly, creative ways to contribute to the flourishing of the “other”
understand how to use resources and networks to reintegrate the hurting and the healing back into society
know how to mobilize a peacemaking movement by identifying, equipping, and mobilizing influencers

As the peacemaking movement gains momentum around the world, it is time that the US American Church invests her best attention and resources on this costly and strategic work and embraces her vocation as an instrument of peace. Thus, these intensives will be tailor made for individuals and communities seeking to build a framework for peacemaking that translates into tangible practices in their homes, neighborhoods, churches, cities and world.

SCHEDULE:

08:30 am – 09:00 am :: Registration
09:00 am – 10:15 am :: Session 1 – Mission of God is Reconciliation
10:15 am – 10:30 am :: Break
10:30 am – 11:45 am :: Session 2 – Everyday Peacemaking Practices: SEE & IMMERSE
11:45 am – 01:15 pm :: Lunch (on own in nearby restaurants)
01:15 pm – 02:30 pm :: Session 3 – Everyday Peacemaking Practices: CONTEND & RESTORE
02:30 pm – 02:45 pm :: Break
02:45 pm – 04:00 pm :: Session 4 – Charting a Way Forward in Your Community

TICKET PRICES:

$49 PRE-SALE, $59 AT THE DOOR

When Heaven Meets Earth

December 25, 2013 by Jer 1 Comment

On Sunday, I served with a team from The Open Door Community at the Bay Area Rescue Mission. Open Door is filled with cross-sector leaders who are doing incredible things in our region, country and world…Darrell is one of them.

In addition to being a part of our community, he joined The Global Immersion Project’s Israeli-Palestinian Learning Lab in 2013 in which his life took a radical shift: he committed to spending his life, vocationally, on the flourishing of the marginalized.

Shortly upon our return, equipped with the practices that make for peace, Darrell found and was found by the Bay Area Rescue Mission. So strong was the pull to the Rescue Mission that a pay cut and a warehouse job seemed like a trade up to Darrell & his wife. They said “Yes!” without hesitation…but this is becoming a habit for these two. They’re actually convinced that the downwardly mobile journey of the Cross is where life, joy and flourishing are found.

After serving a gourmet Christmas dinner to 200+ friends who call the Rescue Mission neighborhood, “home,” we were given an orientation to their work and a behind-the-scenes tour by Darrell. I learned that this organization is contributing significantly to the work of peacemaking by actively restoring back into society men and women who have long been victims of various addictions. I left stunned at the legacy and impact of the Bay Area Rescue Mission. I’ll be back.

One moment stuck out to me more than any other, though. That moment was when Darrell, after giving us a detailed tour of the warehouse, said, referring to “his” warehouse, “This is where heaven meets earth.”

I loved when he said it. I love it even more, having thought about it for a few days.

The warehouse at the Rescue Mission is a small part of this world where generosity collides with recovery and where human flourishing is the result.

Here’s what I mean: The warehouse stores the generous gifts of individuals and corporations who believe in the mission. The warehouse also serves as a place of vocational training for men who are in recovery and a part of the 14 month program. Finally, the warehouse is the place where men in recovery who are regaining their dignity are empowered to distribute what has so generously been given to those who are in dire need. The result? Human flourishing for all involved: Darrell flourishes, the men in the program flourish, and those benefiting from the generosity flourish.

Heaven does in fact meet earth when generosity collides with recovery and fuels human flourishing.

Questions in search of answers:

How are you contributing to “heaven meeting earth?”
In what ways are you spending your life on the flourishing of others?
Is life/joy/fullness found in society’s upwardly mobile journey or in Jesus’ downwardly mobile journey through the Cross to the Resurrection?

Declaring “Peace” this Advent

December 22, 2013 by Jer 4 Comments

Advent has nearly come and gone and, unless you find yourself in a Christian Church with a liturgical bent, it’s possible that you didn’t even know it. Most of us refer to this season of time sandwiched between Thanksgiving and Christmas as “the holidays” and will fill it with beautiful things: family traditions, memories, and meals. For those of us who go to church, we tend to spend Advent remembering the birth of Jesus in the form of stories, kids plays, and songs. While remembering this sacred moment is good, I wonder if Advent needs to be less about remembrance and more about declaration.

But what are we declaring during the Advent Season?

Consider Advent within the Meta-Narrative of God. In the beginning, God spoke existence into being, not because God needed anything, but because God wanted to. Once the scene was set, God entered into the created order and formed the first human being out of dirt, He exhaled His breath into the dirt-man, and the dirt-man woke up. When he woke up, he woke up into a Story that was already in process…a Story that wasn’t about him. And then he exhaled the exhale of God and, in so doing, recognized that everything that he would ever need or become would come from the hand of the One who had just exhaled into him.

The first human got lonely so God put him back to sleep, formed woman, and woke him up again. Then the community of God and the community of humanity danced to the rhythm of God’s heartbeat. It was good…it was the way it was supposed to be. This was Peace.

But soon, we grew discontent with our place. We didn’t like being a participant in the Divine Narrative…we wanted to be Author and Main Character. So, we drafted our own fantasy, convinced ourselves that our fantasy was better than God’s Unfolding Story, and chased it. The moment we did, peace was interrupted: the relationships were severed between us & God, us & ourselves, us & each other, and us & creation.

Simultaneously, grace emerged. God saw the severed relationship but it didn’t cause Him to end the Story. Instead, God immersed into the Story and drew near an unreconciled people. While there, He contended for their flourishing by covering their shame, and immediately committed to the full restoration of relationship.

God made a blood promise to Abraham: I’m coming and when I do, I will spend my life restoring Peace.

The journey toward Peace began as an immigrant journey. Abraham’s family migrated from Ur to Canaan, and then a portion of his family migrated from Canaan to Egypt (where they were enslaved in the brick kilns for 430 years), from Egypt through the wilderness back to Canaan (renamed Israel), and, because they continued to reject their vocation as image-bearers of God, lights unto the world, and global peacemakers, they migrated from Israel to Babylon as exiles.

It was from Babylonian exile that the lyrics for some of our cherished Christmas Carols emerged:

O Come, Desire of nations, bind
in one the hearts of all mankind;
bid every strife and quarrel cease
and fill the world with heaven’s peace.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel,
shall come to thee o Israel!

1000 years later, after a prolonged silence, God spoke again to a people who were once immigrants, slaves, and exiles, and were now occupied.

He spoke to the husband/priest of a barren couple: “Your son will prepare the way for Emmanuel.”
He spoke to a virgin teenage girl: “God’s promise to Abraham is coming true in your womb.”
He spoke to an impoverished carpenter: “Marry the bearer of Emmanuel.”
He spoke to shepherds through angels: “God has made good on His promise! God is here in baby human form.”

If God was here, then God could bleed.
If God could bleed, then God could die.
God truly was making good on His promise to Abraham.

Then the angels celebrated with a song of Peace.

As our Story continued, Jesus…Emmanuel…God with Us…demonstrated for us what it meant to be fully human: at peace with God, self, others, and creation. They nailed Him to a Cross for it and buried Him in a rock. Three days later, neither death, nor rock could contain Jesus. He rose again, found His community and said, “Peace be with you.”

The life, death, and resurrection of Jesus fully restored the severed relationship between God & humanity. The promised Peace was reality.

Therefore, since we live on this side of the Cross and the Empty Grave, we understand the Manger (Advent) as a redemptive moment. The Manger, when viewed thru the lenses of the Cross & the Empty Grave is God’s declaration: “I’m here to spend my life on peace!”

So what do we declare with our words & lives during Advent?

God is faithful: God did what He said He was going to do.
God is for us: God put on flesh, immersed into our conflicted reality, and contended for our flourishing.
God is unconventional: God did what He said He was going to do in a way unlike anyone could have imagined.
God is a peacemaker: God spent his life to restore severed relationships. There’s Peace between us!
Peace is our vocation: God commissioned us to go and spend our lives on the flourishing of others. There’s Peace to Wage!

Questions in search of Answers:

How can you integrate the theme of “Peace” into your family’s understanding of Advent?
How can Advent be a time of practical peacemaking for you and your family?
How can you spend yourself generously on the flourishing of others this Advent?

Introducing The Global Immersion Project!

May 20, 2013 by Jer Leave a Comment

–>

I’m a dreamer…I always have been. My dreams tend to orient around innovative methods that lead to the holistic development of people and, ultimately, to global human flourishing.

Today, after a year of development, listening, refinement, on the ground experience, and opened doors into unthinkable partnerships, one of those dreams is becoming a reality!

In partnership with my friend and co-founder, Jon Huckins, it is my deepest joy to introduce The Global Immersion Project.

[Read more…]

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